Mental Health Time Out

I needed to take a break and unwind for a second.  This song did the trick.

Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros ~ "Up From Below"

This week has been overwhelming.  Sick kids and getting things ready for a baby shower I'm hosting tomorrow.  Then there was a slight fire scare this morning.  I came home to the smoke alarm going off and the smell of smoke outside.  Long story short, there was no fire in the house and Garrett got to sit in the fire truck.  Yay for nice firemen!

I'm secretly pretending to be sitting in the tropics listening to the band play without a care in the world.

Pretty Food {Black Bean & Cheese Nachos}

This is one of my favorite lunches at home.  Simple & delicious!  Cover tortilla chips with black beans, pepper jack cheese & colby cheese, then heat in the microwave.  Top with chopped tomato, red onion & cilantro.

Trick or Treat

This Fall has been jam packed full of fun.  We visited our usual pumpkin patch and picked out the biggest pumpkin there.  Then came home and Allen got busy working his magic.  He takes projects like this very seriously.

The kids picked out two little pumpkins to paint.



We also made sugar cookies because it's just too fun to only do at Christmas time!

Again, Allen took the decorating very seriously & worked in his Oklahoma logo.  He even carved the state into the back side of our pumpkin this year.

Sydney wanted to be a pink cowgirl for Halloween.  I'd say she's the prettiest pink cowgirl I've ever seen!

And Garrett went with spider man.  Words cannot describe how cute his tush looks in this outfit.  He is showing off his muscles here.

Last year he boycotted costumes and refused to dress up.  So I was thrilled when Halloween came & he actually wore it!

It's tradition in our family that my Mama Bertha makes all the Grand kids & Great Grand kids a caramel apple. So she is always our first stop on trick or treat night. 

He ate all the caramel off and left the apple.  Go figure.

After visiting the Grandmas and trick or treating, we came home to check out our loot.  Awesome!

Then we tucked the kids in & went to sleep.  Only to be woke up at midnight by Garrett projectile vomiting.  We thought it must have been candy overload.  But just about the time I got his room cleaned up {it was as bad as you could possibly imagine}, Sydney started.  And so began a cycle of both kids taking turns throwing up for about the next twelve hours.  Nice.  We got zero sleep.  By the 5 am puke I wanted to cry because I was so tired.  Every bed linen in this house was covered in puke & the piles of dirty sheets were taking over the laundry room.  But now, 24 hours later, everyone is doing fine.  And I'm still washing bedding.  Happy Halloween!

Feist ~ "I Feel It All"

An old favorite of mine.

Born Ruffians ~ "Little Garcon"

I've had this on repeat lately.

A Very She & Him Christmas

Is it too early to start playing Christmas music?  Okay, maybe just a tad bit early.  I am anxiously awaiting the holidays so that I can play She & Him's Christmas album all day long.  How adorable is Zooey Deschanel?

Moving Forward

I took a little break from blogging.  When I first started blogging a couple years ago, it was for my own personal viewing. I kept it private for a long time.  It was my therapy.  My outlet.   As a stay at home mom, it's easy to forget who you are besides "mom".  And this blog serves a huge purpose for me to stay in touch with all the little parts of me.  This has become my place in the universe to dump my thoughts, my recipes, my love for music & my randomness. I love blogging. But when you see that people are starting to read everything you've put out there, it gets a little intimidating. 

I am a true Gemini.  A walking contradiction.  One minute I'm an open book, the next I am reverting back into my shell.  So my rule is to blog when I'm loving it, and to take a break when it starts freaking me out. 

Life took another tragic turn for our family.  In August, Allen's Dad died suddenly of a heart attack.  It was a complete shock to us.  We had dinner with him the night before.  We sat at the restaurant and talked for a long time.  Allen sat by his Dad and Garrett sat on the other side of him.  Scottie cut Garrett's dinner up for him.  I'm thankful for that last dinner together with Scottie.  It was completely unplanned and spur of the moment.  I believe this is a perfect example of God working in our lives.  That unplanned last dinner with Scottie was a gift.

The next day we got a call from the Chaplain at the hospital, telling us to come fast.  He wouldn't tell us any details over the phone.  I drove Allen's Grandma {Scottie's Mom} to the hospital & I knew in my heart that our lives would be different on our drive back home. 

It is so hard to wrap my head around all the loss Allen & I have suffered together.  In five short years, we've lost both our Fathers and Allen's best friend, Justin.  I've had to tell Sydney twice that a Grandpa has died.  As a Mother, it's one of the hardest things I've ever had to do.  Looking at their sweet, innocent faces and knowing that what I'm about to say will change them forever. 

Our future flashed before my eyes after saying my last good bye to Scottie.  My babies don't have Grandpas.  Our Mother's are both widows.  Allen & I are both broken and so are our entire families.  How do we make sure our children have a firm foundation to grow on when everyone is broken?   I know Allen has a long, hard road ahead of him.  I want to help him, but I know all I can do is just be here for him.  Here to listen.  Here to hug.  Here to cry.  Here to pick up the slack when he can't muster the strength.  But grief is a private battle within your soul. 

At the end of a dark & tragic turn in life, there is always the opportunity for enlightenment.  Once you are faced with the reality that our time here on this earth can end suddenly, you are forced to evaluate the path you've chosen.  And once you decide the right path, it is time to move forward...one baby step at a time. 

Scottie & Garrett tilling our family garden.

Allen chose the perfect song to play at his Dad's funeral service. 

Dan Auerbach ~ "Goin Home"

Love

Born Ruffians ~ "Sole Brother"

Feist ~ "How Come You Never Go There"

I'm really liking the new Feist album, Metals.